:
I wonder if she’s seeing the dumb fuck from Truth or Dare five years ago–the idiot who saw this pretty girl moving to kiss him and inexplicably knew that if her lips touched his, his world would never be the same again.
He panicked, and he mirrored the only behavioral pattern he’d ever known–cruelty.
Me? Kiss you?
I’d rather cat shit.
50
“Why are you doing this?” she whispers.
Because I need to get you away. Because it’s too late for me–it’s in my fucking blood. But you can get out. You don’t have to call monsters your family.
“Did you really think you and I had any kind of future together? Wake up, April.” I force my voice to remain strong, steady. She has to believe I mean all this. She can’t see how much the words cut as they tear out of me.
“So you don’t… You don’t love me?”
My breath hitches.
That’s the one thing I can’t say. I can repeat ugly phrases bound to dredge up awful memories. I can lie about my intentions to protect
her.
But I can’t say I don’t love her.
Because I do. I love her more than anything in the world, and that lie will wreck me.
“Say it,” she presses, moving closer. I take an instinctive step back. I can’t let her touch me again. If she does, my flimsy resolve will crumble, and I’ll hold her and kiss her and beg her not to leave me.
I’ll ask her to marry me, dooming her to a life where she has to worry whether or not she’s safe from her brother and father–in–law.
“Say it, Nathan,” she hisses. “Say you don’t love me. Say everything has been a lie. Every kiss, every touch, every time you held me, the time–the times–in your room and mine, the football field, fucking yesterday. Look me in the eyes and tell me everything was a goddamn
lie!”
“Miss Farrah!”
April whips around, and my head snaps up. Easton stands at my door, looking like a drill sergeant about to deliver corporal punishment.
I breathe a sigh of relief. He doesn’t know it, but he just saved me from making the monumental mistake of retracing my steps and holding on to the one thing I have to let go.
“You have been eliminated from this competition,” he says to April. “Which means you are-‘
“Trespassing, yeah…” She turns back to me with a sardonic smile. “I’ve been made aware.”
1/2
19:09 Tue, Oct 14 d.
Chapter 155
“Then let’s go.”
I feel her eyes burning into me, but I can’t, I can’t, look at her.
:
I blink when her hand enters my line of vision, holding something–a small velvet box.
I shake my head, my throat closing up with emotion. “No,” I choke out. “That’s yours.”
She shoves it against my chest, and I wince. “I don’t want the physical embodiment of a lie.” Her voice is empty, dead.
I chance one last look at her–and immediately regret my decision.
Her beautiful, expressive face that I could always read like an open book, is shut–a locked door.
༡(50)
She spins on her heels and walks out of my room like she can’t get out fast enough. She slams the door hard enough that I feel it in my chest.
My knees instantly give way, and I sink to the floor.
There’s no separating the pain lancing through my body from the agony stabbing at my heart. There’s no piecing me back together.
You’re scarred and broken and lost, and sometimes you hate yourself so much, you can’t breathe.
I love every part of you, Nathan. Even the parts you hate.
She was wrong. I’m not broken.
Broken pieces can be put together–a little bit of glue and they’ll be good as new.
But there’s no putting back together shattered glass, and trying would only cut her.
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Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
