Chapter 62
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The good days and the bad days blur together. It’s the beauty of having an enforced schedule to keep. No matter how heavy something is, it doesn’t matter. The goal is to keep moving and perfecting the art of following orders. I love having somewhere to be. Somewhere that doesn’t need Sophia the civilian.
Today, however, is starting off crappier than most. Last night, I couldn’t keep anything down, and my stomach feels completely empty. To the point where it hurts as if my insides were eating each other.
My eyes feel like I’ve rubbed sand into them all night. My entire body feels like it’s burning up. With each movement, my muscles feel like they’re ripping apart. There’s a sharp, piercing pain going through the center of my skull, and I can barely see anything a few feet in front of me.
It’s a struggle to sit up in my cot. I look around to find that all the others have left without me. I reach for my phone and dial the last number on my call list. He’s the only one close enough to get to me without making a scene.
“Where the fuck are you, Helvig?” Ragnar demands. “You are so close to finishing stronger than all the other recruits. Why are you choosing now to slack off?”
“Something’s wrong,” I choke out.
“Where are you?” his tone changes immediately.
“Dorm,” I groan when the pain in my head shoots down my spine.
I can hear him try to say things to me, but I can’t focus on him, and I’m no longer able to hold my phone. The ache in my stomach becomes urgent, and I lean over the side of my cot as water and stomach acid explode out of me. I heave enough to make my abdomen cramp like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
What is happening to me? I have one month left of training. Am dying?
“Sophia!” I hear someone shout my name as I gasp to try to catch my breath.
Pain explodes all over my body, and I suddenly feel like I’m free–falling. I think I scream or call out, but everything begins to fade as a burning sensation rips through every single one of my veins. I close my eyes, trying to hold myself together. Maybe keep myself from passing out, but it’s no use. Everything blends in together and fades into nothing.
I open my eyes to find that I am in my old room again. This vision is like the one I had after breaking the mating bond almost three years ago. I feel aware of my surroundings, at least, more than I did back then. I move to the edge of the bed and stand.
My body shivers when there’s a knock on my door. Two quick, polite raps that fill my chest with pain. My eyes water as I slowly reach for the doorknob, knowing what’s behind it. Tears side down my face as I turn the knob and gently pull the door open.
There, on the other side, is the one person I’ve never allowed myself to think about since he passed. I didn’t want my last memory of him to be the one where he was shouting at us to run away at what should have been the most memorable nights of our lives.
“Dad?”
“Hi, kiddo,” he greets me with a smile. “May I come in?”
I step aside and let him walk into my room. I shut my eyes, not owing what to do, and when I turn around to face him, he’s still there, leaning against the bedpost like he hasn’t been missing from my life for the past nine years.
“Am I dead?” I choke out, and he grins the way he always did when he wanted to have a “talk” with me every time I was rude to my grandmother.
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Chapter 62
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“As fucked up as it sounds, Kid. I wish. I’d like nothing more than to hold you in my arms and tell you that everything is fine
now.”
“That makes two of us,” I sniffle and wipe my tears. I go over to the bed and take a seat. “What is happening to me?”
He sits down beside me with that same smile on his face. He’s looking me over as if I were a stranger to him, and maybe even in this fucked up illusion, I am. I’m not the twelve–year–old girl that he knew back then. I’ve grown. I’ll be 22 in a couple of weeks, and the constant training and exercise have significantly reshaped my body.
“It’s odd to see you all grown up,” he admits. “You were so small the last time I held you in my arms. You’re not my babygirl anymore, huh?”
“Seeing as I am your only daughter, that’s not true,” I shake my head, and he laughs. “I miss you so fucking much.”
“We miss you too,” he reaches out to catch my tears. “I’m so sorry Sophie. For all of it. Your mother and I wanted to leave Artume weeks before the attack. We were gathering evidence against the Romano’s to have them removed from their positions, but none of it ever seemed to stick. I even contemplated killing the fucker.”
“This isn’t a dream?”
“It’s more of a vision. It’s a part of your affinity.”
“My affinity?” I ask, confused.
“Yes, silly girl. As it turns out, you are not a part of the werewolf face. You’re like grandma. Almost, because you are only half, you’re an omega of the Lycan race. Congratulations on winning the female lottery.”
“Excuse me?” I laugh.
“Lycan Omegas are the most prized ranks at court. You are officially expanding the Helvig bloodline. I always believed it would be you. I hoped Oliver would be mated to a female Lycan as well. He had so much potential regarding Ragnar’s militia.”
“I’ve heard about that,” I clear my throat. “So, that’s it then? I’m a Lycan, not a werewolf.”
“That’s it,” he nods.
“Why was I mated to a wolf?”
“That is the grand mystery of destiny, no? We have no control over what is to be. It just is,” he shrugs.
“As usual, not helpful in the advice department,” I bump him with my shoulder. He laughs, taking a strand of my hair.
“It’s so long now. I remember you used to keep it short,” he pulls on the ringlet and releases it so it can spring back up.
“I liked how short hair made me look like mom,” I admit, “But now that I’m older, sometimes she’s all I see when I look in
the mirror.”
“I see,” he takes my hand. “She sends her love and wants you to know that even if she can’t respond, she’ll always listen.”
“That’s fucked. Advising me to willingly look like a crazy person by talking to myself,” I laugh.
“I will tell her you said that. Maybe she’ll come and pull your fee in the middle of the night. Boogieman style,” we both laugh.
“What happens now?” I ask.
“The hard part, silly. You give in. To all of it. The physical pain and this one,” he places his hand on my chest. “Let it all out. Let it rip you apart and consume everything that you are. When you wake up, you’ll be brand new. New doors will open, and
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Chapter 62
old ones will close. Just be sure to remember what is really important, Sophia.”
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“What’s that?” I ask because everything that was important has already been stripped away, one painful piece of my soul at a
time.
“You. Who you are. The people who love you and those you’ve learned to love despite how cruel your fate has been,” he stands up, and I panic. I hold on to him, and it only makes him smile bigger. “I feel the same way, Soph, but you have so much to offer this world still.
“I am proud to call you my daughter. Know that, no matter what anyone says or thinks, you are stronger than I was. Than I could have been. I can’t wait to see you again. I know you will never let me down, no matter what you do. I will always be team Sophia.”
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Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
