Chapter 70
ROSETTE
“Let me speak first,” I said in a rush, panting. “Please.”
Axel nodded. “Want to sit down?”
I shook my head so hard that I almost got dizzy. “No. No need for that.”
I inhaled a deep breath, looking at him but I looked away. I couldn’t look at him, not yet. I might lose pacing, my sweaty palms clasped together.
courage.
I started
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“So uhm…” I swallowed the excess saliva in my mouth. I could feel Axel even though I didn’t look at him, feel his nerves, curiosity, everything.
“So I’ve been thinking,” I continued. “After Sofia left, I’ve been doing nothing but thinking. At the beginning, I hated your guts. I hated how free you were and how you took life less seriously. I hated those things because… because I wanted to be just as free and less serious. But with the upbringing I had? With the family I came from? It was impossible.”
I said this all in a rush so I had to pause and catch my breath, but I immediately jumped back to it. Courage, I couldn’t let it slip now that I’ve found it.
“And for whatever reason, you found interest in me. You said it was my scent, that it was drawing you in. You and your brothers. I thought it was some kind of joke. Don’t get me wrong I know I’m beautiful, but men like you Varkas? Bloody rich and handsome? I’m sure you’ve seen more beauty than I. So I thought, “Maybe they just want a new plaything.” I wasn’t a saint or anything, so I jumped right in.”
I paused again, inhaling deeply, and I dared to sneak a glance at Axel to see him just standing there, as still as a statue, unmoving, he wasn’t even blinking. That boosted my courage and I continued.
“I fantasized about all of you. Fantasize things I can never say. You all touched me, did things to me and I loved every second of it. But you, Axel…”
I finally stopped pacing, turning to him and looking him right in the eyes, my chest heaving.
“You….” I whispered. He swallowed, the only movement his entire body made. “You touch me and I–I–I forget! I feel like something. When your hands move through my body, it feels more than lust. When your lips are pressed against mine, moving slow or fast, it feels more than just a kiss. And when you when you thrust into me, it feels so much more than just… fucking. You do things to me like I actually mean something to you. From the very beginning, Axel. You told me precious things should never kneel or beg. You–You-”
My words failed me there and I just stopped, staring at him while he stared back. He was shaking now; it was little, but a shake regardless. I walked to him, taking his hand into mine and stroking it with my thumb, my eyes fixed on his.
He still didn’t move, just stared at me, his throat moving as he swallowed again.
“These past eight days have been heaven for me,” I whispered. “I’ve been happy, happier than I’ve ever been in my entire life. And it’s all because of you. Earlier when you told me you were proud of me, my chest felt like it was going to explode with joy.”
I held his second hand, stepping close until our bodies were touching and I could feel his heartbeat through his clothes; it
was a mess.
“I don’t know what this feeling in my chest is. This tangled, intense, complicated feeling is, but I know I like it. With every moment I spend with you, that feeling only increases. I’ve given up on trying to understand it and I just want to embrace it.
I raised his hand and placed it on my cheek and he finally move, caressing it with his thumb. I smiled softly, rubbing my check on his hand and his gaze softened, his shaking subsiding.
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Chapter 70
“You said these ten days were to win my heart, and guess what?”
“I won it?” he asked softly, his voice hoarse.
“Yes,” I answered in a breath. “Yes, you’ve won it. It’s all yours.”
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He dragged me to his chest, holding me tightly and cradling my head. He said nothing, but there was no need; his heartbeat said everything his lips couldn’t.
“It’s love,” he whispered after a while.
I pulled away from the hug, looking up at him with my eyebrows furrowed. “What?”
He looked down at me, an intense look in his eyes, a look I still couldn’t decipher.
“That tangled and intense feeling in your chest, it’s love, Rosette
I could only stare at him. “Love…” He nodded. “Do you feel it too?”
“For a long time. It just took me a while to figure out what it was.
“Love…” I whispered again. “Love.”
He cupped my face, leaning down and resting his forehead. “Love, Rosette. You’re in love with me.”
“And you’re in love with me,” I said, looking into his
eyes.
“Madly, utterly in love with you. I love you to the point where it could ruin me. It could also save me. That’s the beauty of love, you see? It has the ability to do both.” He kissed the top of my nose gently, closing his eyes. “You’ve already ruined me, sweetheart. This time, save me.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck. “Love.”
Why was I shocked about that? What else could this feeling be if not love? There was really no need to be shocked.
“I’m leaving,” he said all of a sudden and I flinched back from him, my eyes wide.
“W–what?” I stammered. “You’re leaving? After this? After I just poured out my heart to you?”
“Let me explain.” He reached out to me but I stepped back. Hurt flashed across his face. “Baby, please. It wasn’t supposed to be today. I planned to leave the day after tomorrow, but this… I was unprepared.”
“You already planned to leave and you’re just telling me?” I asked in a whisper.
He stepped closer to me and when I didn’t step back, he drew me into his arms, placing my head on his chest.
“I’m so sorry. I was stupid. I should have told you as soon as I made my plans but I didn’t want to ruin what we shared. It was so fragile that I feared a single breeze would knock it over.”
I raised my head and looked up at him. “Did you have such little faith in us?”
His arms tightened around me. “I did, and for that I’m sorry.”
I sighed, placing my head back on his chest. “Why are you leaving?”
“Some… business stuff.”
“You’re lying, aren’t you?”
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Chapter 70
He scoffed. “Yes. I’m sorry. I promise one day I’ll tell you everything.”
I said nothing, just kept my head on his chest and heard his heartbeat. It has slowed down.
“Make love to me before you go.”
