Chapter 48
Kiana
After dinner, Troy excused us, citing pack business that needed seeing to. I had no idea where we were going, and he didn’t say a word until we reached Razor’s Edge. With a few quiet words, he dismissed the guards, and we headed straight up to the small apartment I used to call home. When he closed the door behind us, he leaned heavily against it and closed his eyes.
“How are you feeling?” Agitated, I started to pace the small area.
“Drained. The spell saps you of the change, but it’s takes everything we have in us. That ability is written in every cell of our body. It’ll take time to recharge. Why are you running from me?”
Running? It took me a moment to realize that he meant my pacing. It had taken me all the way
across the apartment.
“Habit,” I said restlessly. “In this space, I’m not really used to welcoming others.”
“You’re mad at me, Kiana.” Locking the door, he moved to the armchair and sat heavily in it.
Ignoring his statement, I walked to the opposite window and stared out. “You sent the guards away. Is that wise?”
“Not away. I wanted some privacy, so they’re guarding a larger perimeter. Do you see that new wall
cabinet?”
Curious, I walked to the new piece of furniture and opened the door. Six security monitors flared to life and showed me a quarter of a mile perimeter around the restaurant.
“What is this?”
“Security,” he said dryly.
“I can see that. Why is it here?” Was he about to kick me out of his bedroom? It wasn’t like I wanted to be there, but he’d made such a big deal about me staying there, and now he was doing this?
“When the alphas are gone, you’ll have a choice,” he said carefully. “For now, I might consider putting the maiden here. She won’t be safe with the other witches, and this building is already heavily guarded. Of course, that’s assuming I trust these guards. I have no idea the damage Bridget has done or how widespread the treachery grew.”
So not now, but in the future. A future where I apparently have the choice of staying here but not in Troy’s bed. I swallowed hard. “I doubt Dean and Bridget expected to be caught, and they wouldn’t recruit lightly. We should be able to track their movements, but I doubt we’re looking at too many
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“Kiana?”
“Hmm?” Tearing myself away from the monitors, I walked to the little kitchenette. What other changes had he made?
“Please look at me, mate.”
Claim
The bond brightened within me, and I immediately surrounded it with my darkness. “We’re alone,” I said finally as I turned. “You don’t need to call me that
“It’s true.”
“And yet you’ve apparently spent all this time thinking that the bond doesn’t affect me. Punishing
me.”
“Kiana…”
The annoyance had built into pain and anger, and I couldn’t hold back anymore. “You could have asked! At any point, you could have asked me how I felt. I would have told you the truth!”
“Told you how this mating bond cuts through the voice. Annoyingly so. How I feel you all the time. You invade my dreams. You influence my actions. You make me feel everything.”
“I know.”
Frustrated tears gathered in my eyes. “You brought me back against my will. You keep me here because I’m a null, but you also spent all this time pushing me away for the very same reason. Is this how we’re going to be, Troy? Fucking like we can’t stay away from each other any longer, but circling each other the rest of the time?”
“Kiana, I…I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?” I snarled, voice thick with rage and the kind of heartbreak that never really scabs over. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?”
His eyes shuttered, voice graveled and low, like the weight of all his regrets had finally settled on his chest. “Remember that I’m in an unfamiliar situation… and I’m fucking it up. Badly. Every word you said-it’s true. You deserve more. So much more. You deserve a mate who doesn’t drag you through hell just to feel wanted. But instead, you got me.” He swallowed hard, and his voice broke. “I’m what you’re stuck with. But I can learn, Kiana. I’ve made so many fucking mistakes in the past.”
“I treated you like shit. For years. After we first mated, I… I pushed you away like you were the thing I feared most, and not the only damn peace I’ve ever known. You should leave me.”
He looked up at me then, raw and torn wide open.
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“But if you did… I’d come after you. Every damn time. I’d chase you to the ends of the earth, haul you back bloody and breathless if I had to because I can’t fucking lose you. My wolf would go feral without you. I would go feral without you. I need you like breath, and I know I don’t deserve another shot… but I’m still asking for one.”
He exhaled roughly, every word scraping off his pride until he wasn’t Alpha troy anymore, just a man, stripped down to longing, and desperate for his mate.
“I know what I said about not giving you a choice. That was wrong. You do have a choice. You can
hate me. Tear me to pieces. Rip me apart for every year I made you feel like nothing. Make my life
hell. Just… stay while you do it. Stay until I’ve earned it, until I’ve fixed this bond so thoroughly you
don’t feel like bleeding anymore. I’m begging you, Kiana. I’ll spend the rest of my life earning you.
Please… let me try.”
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