Chapter 301
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“You mentioned trauma before,” he said once they were gone. “And I’ve been thinking about that, too. I think whatever happened to you, whatever it is you won’t talk about, it’s affecting the way you see me. The way you see everything.”
He wasn’t wrong. But he also wasn’t right, either. It was more complicated than that.
“I want to understand,” he said. “I want to help you work through it, whatever it is. But you have to let me in, Ellie. You have to trust me.”
I bit down on the inside of my cheek hard enough to taste blood.
Trust him. The idea was almost laughable. How was I supposed to trust the man who’d let me die? Who’d put my crown on Vivian’s head while I was still dying in bed?
But then again, this wasn’t that Dominic. Not yet. Maybe not ever, if I could just figure out how to stop it.
“I don’t know if I can do that,” I said quietly.
Dominic sighed. “I know. But I’m asking you to try.”
I looked at him. Really looked at him. At the exhaustion written all over his face, the lines around his eyes that hadn’t been there a few months ago. He looked like he hadn’t slept any better than I had.
“Why?” I asked. “Why do you even care? It would be so much easier to just divorce me and be done with it.”
“Because you’re my mate,” he said simply. “And despite everything, despite all the fighting and the distrust and the absolute hell we’ve put each other through, I still…” He stopped and looked away. “I still love you.”
My throat tightened.
I wished he would just divorce me. I really did. It would make everything so much simpler. I could leave, join Lucas’s organization, start over somewhere far away from here, away from all of this.
But deep down, in a place I wished didn’t exist, I knew I didn’t really want that either.
Because as much as I hated him sometimes, as much as I was terrified of him and what he represented, there was still a part of me that loved him too. That remembered what it felt like to be loved by him, albeit briefly, back before everything went wrong. That wanted to believe he could be different this time.
I hated that part of myself. But it was there, and no matter what, it constantly dug its heels in and refused to go away.
“I don’t know what to say,” I finally managed.
“You don’t have to say anything right now,” Dominic said. He stood and held out his hand. “But I do have something for you. Come on.”
I looked at his hand, then up at his face.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“Home,” he said.
I didn’t take his hand, but I did stand. We walked back to where he had parked his car in the visitor lot, and I climbed into the passenger seat without a word.
When we pulled up to the gates, Dominic glanced at me. “Whatever happens,” he said, “just keep an open mind. Okay?”
I frowned. “What does that mean?”
He didn’t answer, just parked the car and got out.
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I followed him inside. The house was quiet. Dominic led me through the hallway and stopped at the entrance to the living room. He gestured for me to go in first.
I stepped through the doorway and froze.
There was a woman sitting in the armchair across from the sofa. She couldn’t have been much older than us, perhaps in her early thirties, with wispy blonde hair and a bright smile. She stood when she saw me enter and extended her hand.
“You must be Ellie,” she said as I tentatively shook her hand. “My name is Dr. Reeves, but you can call me Amy. I’m the couples therapist your husband hired.” She gestured to the sofa. “Shall we get started?”
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