Chapter 107
“That wasn’t your fault,” Nathan says in a strained voice. “You couldn’t have known.”
“That doesn’t matter! I’ve been such an awful sister; I shouldn’t have been distracted. I should have been with her, not you!”
Nathan frowns. “She’s her own person, April. You can’t be with your sister twenty–four seven; that’s not how it works.”
I nod. “You’re right. But why is it that every time she gets hurt, instead of being with her, I’m with you?!”
Hurt flashes in his eyes, and his voice is slightly hoarse when he says, “What?”
I swallow hard. “The banquet night. I was with you out on the balcony and when I returned, I got the news of her accident. And again, I was with you when she almost died.”
“What are you saying?”
I shake my head. “If I have to choose between you and her-”
An incredulous sound snaps out of him. “Do you hear yourself, April? Choose? What, am I bad voodoo? Is your sister going to die if we get married?”
The image of June unconscious on that floor flashes through my mind, and I inhale sharply.
“Don’t say that.”
“You’re the one saying that!”
“I won’t sacrifice my sister for my own selfish d—”
“That’s not what this is!”
I plant my feet on the floor and stand, ignoring the coldness. “You don’t understand, Nathan; June is my only family in this world. I can’t
lose her.”
“I understand-”
“No, you don’t!” I snap. “You don’t even like your own family.”
Nathan jerks back like I slapped him, and shame immediately washes over me.
“I’m sorry,” I say instantly, not having the guts to look at him. “That was so wrong to say. I’m sorry.”
“You’re right,” Nathan says after a beat. “I don’t like my family. If what happened to June happened to them, I might not care as much as
I should.”
I feel his finger under my chin, tilting my head back to look up at him. His eyes are stormy, trapping me in place.
“But I like you,” he whispers. “I care about you. If June is your only family, then you’re mine.”
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Chapter 107
I close my eyes as a tear rolls down my cheek.
“You can blame me if you want, April. I don’t care. But you were happy in that closet. We were being silly, we were fooling around and you liked it; you were living for yourself.” He exhales. “I’m so sorry June got hurt. But I’m not going to apologize for wanting you or wanting to be with you.”
“Nathan-”
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“You can’t leave,” he says earnestly, and it’s different from all the times he’s asked me to stay. He sounds like if I leave, I’ll be tearing him apart in the process.
“It’s not a coincidence that she keeps getting hurt,” I whisper. “It’s not, and I can’t pretend like it is. I can’t keep putting her in harm’s way.”
“I’ll fix it,” Nathan says.
“How?” I ask, reaching for him. I grip his shirt like it’s a lifeline. I can feel his heart thundering against my knuckles. “Tell me how to keep June from getting hurt. Tell me how to be with you not at my sister’s expense.”
A muscle ticks in his jaw as his eyes harden. Then, with surprising speed, he cups my jaw and kisses me.
It’s not a soft or sweet kiss. It’s hard, frustrated, desperate.
Nathan pulls away before I can register what’s happening.
“I’ll fix it,” he repeats, and there’s a fiery determination in his eyes that sends my heart racing.
Then he turns on his heels and leaves the room without another word.
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