Chapter 74
He clenches his jaw. “I didn’t want them to hurt you.”
A somber smile spreads on my face. “See? How are you the bad?”
He shakes his head, reaches back, untangles my arms around his neck, and stands. He walks to the other side of the room and leans against his dresser.
“I lie during press conferences about how perfect my family is. I cover for my mom every time she’s plastered in public. I push Peter away because his brightness pisses me off. I’m the one who fired Sarah that night.” He shakes his head. “I’m all kinds of bad, April.”
I shake my head. “You can keep listing things, but you won’t change my mind.”
He fixes his gaze on me, and something in it makes me stiffen. “Once, in high school, I was at a party with some friends, and we were playing Truth or Dare.”
My eyes widen, and my heart starts to gallop in my chest.
“A female classmate was dared to kiss the most attractive guy in the room, and she chose me.” It’s a struggle to hear Nathan amidst the blood roaring in my ears. “I’d seen her around school once or twice, and I thought she was cute, but the moment she moved closer to me…” He runs a hand down his face. “Something came over me, and I humiliated her in front of everyone at the party and, eventually, the whole school.”
I swallow tightly. “Wh–why are you telling
He sighs. “So you can know, April. I’m not a person who does good things. The Ashfords aren’t good people, and I join that category simply by being related to them.”
I stand up. “Don’t you see? The fact that you’re so self–aware, that you feel even a shred of guilt, means you’re not in that category. You do those things because, as shitty as your family is, you still love them which is pretty fucking admirable.”
“And the girl in high school?”
I shake my head. “That was in the past.”
Nathan throws his head back and groans. “You don’t need to do this, April. I know what I am, and I know my lot in life.”
“Stop it,” I say, my voice thick with emotion. My heart can’t handle seeing Nathan like this–raw and bleeding.
I move closer to him and take his hand. “Why can’t you see that none of what you’re saying is even remotely true?”
He brings his head forward to look down at me. “You don’t know me, April, not really.”
I tilt my head to the side. “Really? I know you’re kind–look at all you’ve done for June, a near stranger. I know you’re sweet–sweeter than you realize. I know you’re fiercely protective–you’ll do anything to protect those you care about. I know that you’re warm and funny and innately good.”
I reach up and cup his cheek, feeling a slight stubble against my palm. “You’re the one who doesn’t know who you are.”
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14:54 Sat, Oct 4
Chapter 74
Nathan doesn’t say anything for a full minute, and neither of us moves, locked in sizzling eye contact.
“I didn’t answer your question earlier,” he whispers.
I frown. “What question?”
“Who did I hope to win?”
My heart shudders. “Oh.”
1 feel a hand brace against my hip, drawing me closer.
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“You,” he says so softly, I think I imagine it. But then, he says again, “It’s always been you. From the moment you fell into my arms that first day.”
He doesn’t give me a second to process the overwhelming information as he cups my face, leans down, and kisses me.
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