Chapter 45
Amelia’s POV
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I exhaled shakily, rubbing my hands over my face. My chest ached with a mixture of longing and fear. The last few days had been…. too much. Ever since I told him the truth, it felt like I’d ripped open an old wound I had spent years pretending didn’t exist.
Scarlet stirred beside me, her lashes fluttering. “Mommy?”
“Yes, baby,” I whispered, brushing a strand of hair off her cheek.
Her lips curved into a sleepy smile. “Can we go to the park today?”
“Maybe,” I said softly. “We’ll see how the day goes.”
She nodded, already half–asleep again. I lay there, watching her chest rise and fall, my heart tightening with every breath she took. She was my everything. My purpose. My reason for surviving the years that had broken me.
But Edmund’s face kept flashing through my mind, the guilt in his eyes, the tenderness in the way he’d touched Scarlet’s hair, the quiet way he’d whispered hello.
I didn’t know how to feel about any of it.
After dressing and getting Scarlet ready for breakfast, I found Mum in the kitchen, humming softly as she
sliced fruit.
“You didn’t sleep much again,” she said without looking up.
“I’m fine,” I murmured, though my voice didn’t sound convincing even to me.
She gave me that knowing look mothers have, the kind that sees straight through every wall you build. “You’re thinking about him again.”
I sighed, taking a seat at the counter. “I don’t know what to think anymore. Every time I convince myself I’m done with him, that I’ve built a life that doesn’t need him… he shows up and everything just falls apart.”
Mum placed the knife down and faced me. “Amelia, maybe it’s not falling apart. Maybe it’s finally coming together.”
I stared at her, incredulous. “Coming together? Mum, the man’s married.”
Her expression softened. “And miserable, from what I can tell. People make mistakes, love. But you can’t punish him forever if his heart is still with you.”
I bit the inside of my cheek. “That’s easy for you to say. You didn’t spend years raising a child alone, terrified that the world, or he, would find out.”
She walked around the counter and cupped my cheek gently. “I’m not saying you should forget what he did.
20:40 Wed, Jan 28
Chapter 45
But you also can’t keep living like this, half in the past, half afraid of the future.”
I blinked back tears. “I just don’t want to lose Scarlet. If the tabloids ever find out…”
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Her thumb brushed away a tear that escaped. “Then you’ll face it, the way you’ve faced everything else. You’re stronger than you think.”
Before I could respond, Leyla burst into the kitchen, her curls bouncing and phone in hand. “Okay, please tell me I’m not the only one who can’t stop thinking about that man,” she said dramatically.
I frowned. “Leyla—”
“No, listen,” she said, sliding onto the stool beside me. “He came here yesterday with gifts, Amelia. Actual gifts. Do you know how hard it was pretending not to cry when he gave Scarlet that teddy bear?”
Mum chuckled softly. “It was sweet.”
Sweet. That’s what everyone thought. But all I could feel was panic.
I glanced at Leyla. “You don’t get it. Every time he shows up, people start talking. The neighbors, the nurses at the hospital… everyone.”
She rolled her eyes. “And let them. You can’t live your life tip–toeing around gossip. The man clearly still loves you.”
“Love?” I laughed bitterly. “He had a chance to love me once. He left instead.”
Leyla’s expression softened. “People change, Amelia.”
“Do they?”
Silence. Even the kettle’s whistle seemed too loud as it filled the space.
Finally, Mum spoke quietly. “Maybe what scares you isn’t him, but how much you still want him.”
That one hit hard.
******
Later that afternoon, I sat outside on the porch while Scarlet played in the small yard. She was chasing butterflies, her laughter echoing across the quiet street. I tried to focus on the sound. But then my phone buzzed.
Edmund: Can we talk?
My heart skipped a beat. I stared at the message, my thumb hovering over the screen.
No.
But even as I told myself that, I could feel the weight of unspoken words pressing against my chest. The truth was, part of me wanted to see him. I wanted to talk. I wanted to stop pretending I didn’t still care.
20:40 Wed, Jan 28
Chapter 45
:
Scarlet ran up to me, holding a small yellow flower. “For you, Mommy.”
I smiled, taking it gently. “Thank you,
sweetheart.”
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She grinned, then ran off again, her curls bouncing. I watched her, my throat tightening. What kind of future was I building for her? One built on fear and silence, or one that allowed her to know her father?
But if Edmund was serious about wanting to be in our lives, what did that mean for everything else? For his marriage, his reputation, the chaos that would come with his name?
I didn’t want Scarlet growing up under flashing cameras or cruel headlines. I didn’t want her heart broken by promises that fame and guilt could shatter.
I closed my eyes, whispering to myself, “God, what am I supposed to do?”
And even later that night, after putting Scarlet to bed, I found myself sitting by the window, nursing a cup of tea that had almost gone cold.
I didn’t hear Leyla come in until she dropped onto the couch beside me with a sigh.
“You’re doing that thing again,” she said.
“What thing?”
“Staring into the void like it owes you money.”
I smiled faintly. “It’s cheaper than therapy.”
She leaned back, folding her arms. “You love him, don’t you?”
I let out a shaky laugh. “Love isn’t the problem.”
“Then what is?”
“Everything else.” I looked down at my tea. “He’s married, Leyla. And I don’t trust him, not completely. Not yet.”
“But you want to.”
I didn’t answer, but that was enough.
After a moment, she stood up, ruffling my hair affectionately. “Just promise me one thing, don’t push him away just because you’re scared. Sometimes fear and love come hand in hand.”
When she left, I leaned back against the couch and let my head fall against the cushion.
Maybe she was right. But fear was easier. Safer.
I glanced toward Scarlet’s room and thought about Edmund again. About the way his voice softened when he spoke to her. About the light in his eyes that told me no matter what he loved her.
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Chapter 45
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A part of me wanted to believe that love could fix everything. That maybe, after all these years, fate was giving us a second chance.
But another part whispered reminders of everything that could go wrong, the headlines, the custody battles, the heartbreak.
I pressed my palms together and breathed deeply.
AD
Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
