Chapter 5
Ryder blew up my phone-call after call after call.
Normally I’d answer before the second ring, no matter what.
This time, I powered off completely.
When he finally got home, he found me sitting on our apartment floor with swollen eyes, surrounded by shredded paper.
My old love letters from high school All eighteen of them.
very embarrassing word of my teenage obsession laid bare.
le knew exactly what they were and rushed over: “Jess, what are you doing?”
And why the hell did you cancel our wedding? The coordinator called me freaking out!”
pushed him away and grabbed another letter, tearing it in half right in front of him.
ike finally ripping through the lie we’d been living.
looked him dead in the eye: “You treat me like a house cat, Ryder. Pet me when you feel like it, then act like I don’t exist when you’re busy.”
You never actually hear what I’m saying. My thoughts don’t matter. My feelings don’t matter. I’m just… there.”
Did marrying me make you feel good about yourself? Like you were doing me some huge favor?”
le grabbed my hands: “This is about Vivian, isn’t it? Someone saw you at the office…”
shook my head.
f not her, it would’ve been someone else eventually.
ut he kept going, getting desperate: “I’ve told you a thousand times, we’re just coworkers. We’ve never even grabbed coffee alone.”
Check my phone if you want. Read my texts, go through everything.”
When I wouldn’t stop shaking my head, his patience snapped:
Jesus, Jess! Don’t you trust me at all? You’re gonna torch our marriage over your paranoia?”
hat’s when this weird calm settled over me:
There it is. Even now, you think I’m just being crazy.”
Maybe we were never compatible and I just couldn’t admit it.”
I’ll never get your coding stuff, and you think everything I care about is stupid.”
You hate when I mess with your things or ask about work. But God forbid I have a normal conversation with one of your buddies-you’ll ice me out for days.”
I’m human too, Ryder. I hurt. I feel things,”
But I kept trying because you said I was all you had left after your mom died.”
‘I came running every single time you needed me, and you wouldn’t meet me halfway. You were literally backing away.”
洽
My voice broke: “I’m exhausted.”
All these years, I’d thrown myself at him completely.
He was the one who proposed. He was the one who promised forever.
1 bought every word.
But loving someone who barely tolerated you was like screaming into empty space-no echo, no response, just crushing silence.
I’d turned into this jealous, clingy mess. Someone I didn’t even recognize.
What was the point of fighting for someone who didn’t want to fight for me?
I slowly slipped off my ring while he watched.
It took every ounce of strength I had to force out the words:
“I want a divorce.”
His eyes went red and his voice cracked: “You sure about that?”
Ryder was too proud to grovel. He’d never beg me to stay-that wasn’t who he was.
I watched his face go completely cold with my silence.
‘Fine. You’re the one who said it.”
‘Jessa Mills, since this is what you want-don’t you dare come back regretting it.”
