Chapter 44
* 1750
I kept my back to him as I peeled off my shirt, fingers working slowly, methodically, like muscle memory could shield me from the way ko stare burned into my skin. When I dropped my shorts, I caught the flicker of breath behind me. A soft inhale. Almost a gasp, I didn’t let I could feel him watching. My cock stirred. Damn it.
Not here. Not now. Not like this.
I turned slightly, just enough to face the row of tiles and angle myself away, hiding what had begun to rise. My jaw clenched. My shoulders
tensed. Every instinct screamed for me to turn, to take, to touch–but I stayed rooted. Because if I gave in now, I’d lose everything
He was getting closer. Tentative steps. The soft whisper of fabric sliding down skin.
I closed my eyes. His shorts. He was taking them off. Coming to me. I could picture it–Noah stepping toward the shower, bare, vulnerable, his skin flushed with shame and desire. The mental image was enough to make my whole body throb.
Don’t.
My fists curled at my sides. My voice came out low, sharp–cut from the edge of restraint. “Stop.”
He froze. I didn’t turn to look; I couldn’t afford it. The moment I saw his face, I would crumble.
“I don’t know what you think you’re doing,” I said quietly, “but I haven’t given you permission to join me.”
His breath hitched. I heard it. Felt it. And it cut deeper than I expected.
“Get dressed,” I said. “Wait for me by the car at the usual time.”
I turned the water on–hot, punishing–just to drown out the sound of my own damn heartbeat. Behind me, nothing but silence. From behind the water jets, I took a quick glance at his motionless silhouette before perceiving the quiet rustle of movement. Clothes pulled on. A zipper. A hesitant step back.
He didn’t say a word. Neither did I. Because if I did, I’d say the wrong thing. If I looked, I’d take him. And if I took him here, in this place, that door unlocked and a thousand futures at risk–I’d lose him. For good.
So I stood under the spray, fists clenched, jaw locked, water scalding my skin… and hated myself for doing the right thing.
By the time the day crawled to its final stretch, the heat had seeped into erything–skin, breath, bone. The second round of drills had left most of the team dragging, half–conscious shadows of their morning selves
I hadn’t spoken to Noah once.
The ache in my chest hadn’t dulled. If anything, the silence had sharpened it. Every time I looked at him, I remembered the steam curling around his bare frame, the way his muscles had tensed when I rejected hi… and the look I hadn’t let myself see when I continued to lock
away.
By now, it was nearly five. The sun hung lower, a sharp eye blazing down the parking lot as I approached the car, uncertain if he’d be there at all.
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22:35 Sat, Feb 7 D
Chapter 44
Part of me hoped he wasn’t.
Part of me prayed he was.
And when I saw him–leaning against the passenger door, arms crossed, jaw set like stone–it knocked the air clean out of me.
17%
Noah was a picture of contradiction. That same tight athletic frame, glistening slightly from the heat, his eyes hidden behind a scowl so layered it could’ve been carved. Anger. Hurt. Pride. Shame.
But mostly… anger. And, oh, I knew that anger well–I’d taught it to him.
Taking a deep breath, I braced myself. This was going to be a fun evening.
Comments
R Visitor
I can’t put it down
7 days ago
29
Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
