I always open my cafeteria only for half a day whenever it is Sunday. The factory is closed and most of my customers are all employees there, which is why only a few people are visiting my place.
So, I closed at noon and made sure that my helper was able to get home. And after that, I decided to go home.
And while I was approaching the apartment where I rented unit, I frowned when I saw that most of my neighbors were outside, whispering about something.
There are also ambulances and that made me nervous so I immediately ran toward there thinking that something was going on in my house.
And when I finally reached the gate of the compound, I saw Mikea’s mother, Michelle, was unconsciously lying down on the ambulance stretcher. Beside her is Mikea’s sister, Michaella, who was crying.
“What happened here?” I asked Lucile, one of my neighbors who was also curious about what was happening. Why is Michelle unconscious?”
(
“She had a heart attack,” she answered. “Michaella said her mother had heart disease. But because they are taking care of her more with the right diet and exercise, she never had an attack.”
I turned my eyes to Michelle who was already inside the ambulance and Michaella who was still crying while saying that it was her fault.
“They say that Michaella has done something that made Michelle mad,” she added. “That is why she got a heart attack.” She flicked her tongue. “I am sure that there will be trouble later in their house.”
I just nodded and when the ambulance was already left, I immediately ran toward my unit.
“Mommy!”
My eyes widened when I was greeted by a sudden hug from Millie, a four years old kid that has been living here with me and my daughter. Millie!”
Paige was in her back, one of our neighbors that I hired to babysit her whenever I am in the cafeteria.
“Sorry, Milan,” Paige said. “She was scared when she heard the fight between Michelle and Michaella.”
“What?”
She nodded. “They were fighting when the old lady got a heart attack,” she added. “So, the whole compound is noisy and she is scared because she only hears the fighting.
I caressed Millie’s hair as I tried to calm her down. “I will take care of her, Paige. You can go home now.”
She smiled and nodded. “Okay.” She got her things and before she could even get out of my house, I gave her an envelope containing her salary for babysitting my daughter “Thank you again, Milan.”
“Thank you too, Paige.” I closed my unit’s door and turned my attention to Millie. “So? Are you going to tell me what happened?”
She shook her head.
Well, this is not the first time that there was a fight inside Mikea’s house. They are fighting most of the time and they love screaming, especially at night when everyone is to their home.
That is why I decided to make our room soundproof so that Millie will stay there and she will not hear anything they are saying.
I don’t want her to grow up thinking that it is okay for a family to scream at each other all the time.
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I want to avoid her from that kind of environment as much as I can.
But it looks like Paige didn’t bring her immediately inside the room which is why she heard what was happening in Mikea’s house.
I sat beside her and held her hand. “Mommy is already here, baby,” I said. “You know that I will protect you no matter what happens right?”
She lifted her head and looked at me. “I am just sad, Mommy.”
“Why?”
“Because they are fighting,” she said. “And I thought that maybe someday, we will also fight like them. And I don’t want that to happen.”
“Oh, baby…” I hugged her tight.
I don’t know why but now that she is turning five years old, he started to become mature, and most of the things that she thinks are about what might happen in the future.
Rather than thinking of some simple things like what she will eat later or what she is going to play with her friends.
That is why I am careful with everything that I tell her because she always over thinks about everything now.
“That is not going to happen, baby,” I assured her. “Besides, fighting within a family is normal. It was just a misunderstanding and they can fix that after a while. Though I can promise you that I will not raise my voice if you did something wrong.”
I tried my best not to raise my voice when I disciplined her. always talk to her in a nice and calm voice. And I never hit her even though she is naughty because I always think that it is normal for kids to behave like that.
And I want her to do what she wants while she is still a kid because I know when she grows up, she might not get a chance to do any of that.
Life is very different when a person is still a kid and when she reaches adulthood where she needs to take all the responsibility for herself.
As much as possible, I always choose the nice and calm way so she will not hide anything from me as she grows up.
“What if I do something very terrible?” she asked. “Like very–very terrible. Do you think you can still be calm to me?”
“Yes, baby,” I said. “You know that I am not saying anything unsure, right? And I always hold on to my promise.”
She let go of the hands and wiped her face. “Sure?”
I nodded and smiled. “I am pretty sure.”
“Okay,” she said. “Then, I will hold on to that promise,”
“Right!” I pinched her cheeks.
I only learned that I was pregnant with Millie, two months fter I left the house of my ex–husband.
And to be honest, I don’t know what I should do at that time
I am confused about the situation because I was too hurt by what he did to me. But I won’t deny that there is something in my heart saying that he will change if he only knew that I am pregnant.
Our marriage was probably saved if I chose to come back and tell him that we had a child but I was too scared to
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face him.
Especially when I accidentally saw him with a woman who was so happily hugging him tight.
And that made me realize that he doesn’t love me anymore
So, I choose to let go of him and hide my pregnancy.
I even filed for divorce, signed it, and emailed it to him with the help of Ferry. And I let my friend handle everything because I don’t have anything to do with him anymore.
The only connection I have with him right now is this little girl. And she is the only reason why I don’t regret the love that I gave to her father.
“Mommy!” She held my hand to stop me from pinching her cheeks. “My cheeks are already red.”
“It is okay, baby.” I kissed both of her cheeks. “You are still cute like a princess. Everyone will still love you.”
I am just glad that even though she grew up without a father, she never asked anything about him. I know that she has been wondering why she never had a chance to meet her father, but she never questioned me.
And it looks to me like she was just waiting for me to tell her in my own time when I am ready.
“I am really glad that you are my daughter.‘
She looked at me and smiled wider. “Well, I am just lucky that you are my mommy.”
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Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
