The Attention 383 Summary
In “The Attention 383,” the narrator grapples with feelings of jealousy and insecurity as she observes her partner, Ashton, tending to their newborns, Minnie and Mickey. Despite her internal reassurances, she can’t shake off the slight pang of jealousy when Ashton pays more attention to the babies than to her. However, his affectionate gestures, like kissing her forehead and calling her his favorite, provide her with a comforting warmth, even as she feels like a ghost in her own home.
As the night unfolds, the narrator witnesses Ashton’s dedication as he cares for Minnie during her cries, even while she battles exhaustion. She longs to stay awake and cherish the tender moments between Ashton and their daughter but ultimately succumbs to sleep. The next morning reveals Ashton already engaged in the morning routine, expertly feeding the babies, which fills her with pride but also highlights her feelings of inadequacy as a new mother.
Their interactions are playful yet tinged with concern, especially when the narrator notes Ashton’s lack of sleep. Despite her attempts to assure him that she can manage with the babies while he runs errands, an unsettling feeling lingers. Ashton’s calm demeanor in handling the babies, especially during messy situations, contrasts sharply with the narrator’s insecurities about her own maternal capabilities.
As Ashton takes Minnie for a diaper change, the narrator is left with a mix of admiration and guilt. She questions her ability to be a good mother, feeling overwhelmed by the demands of parenthood while Ashton seems to navigate it with ease. This moment of vulnerability culminates in her seeking reassurance from Mickey, who looks at her with innocent confusion, leaving her to ponder her worth as a mother amidst the chaos of their new life.
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**TITLE: The Attention 383**
Jealous? Absolutely not, I reassured myself, yet a nagging feeling tugged at my insides, suggesting that perhaps, just maybe, I felt a flicker of jealousy. Just a tiny bit, if I were being honest.
Ashton emerged from the shower, droplets of water still glistening on his skin, and the first thing he did was check on Minnie, then Mickey. Not a single glance was cast in my direction, as if I were a mere ghost lingering in the background, invisible and unimportant.
With a soft smile, he bent down and pressed a gentle kiss on my forehead. “Don’t worry. You’re still my favorite,” he murmured, his voice warm and reassuring.
“Childish,” I retorted, unable to suppress the smile that crept onto my lips.
Whether I was his favorite or not, hearing those words filled me with a comforting warmth.
“Go to sleep,” he urged, his tone laced with a hint of authority, though I could sense the affection behind it.
I nestled closer to him, my head resting against his chest, and within moments, I succumbed to the embrace of sleep.
In the depths of the night, I was vaguely aware of Minnie’s soft cries breaking through the silence. Just one brief wail, and then it was quiet again. I blinked my eyes open slightly and caught a glimpse of Ashton, cradling our daughter in his arms while speaking softly into the phone, requesting the night nurse to bring in the freshly prepared bottle.
I wanted to stay awake and watch him, to soak in the tender moment, but exhaustion wrapped around me like a heavy blanket, and I drifted back into slumber.
Morning arrived, and when I finally opened my eyes, I found Ashton already busy feeding the babies again. He started with Mickey, who had miraculously slept soundly through the night, before turning his attention to Minnie. She was notoriously particular about her milk; if it wasn’t just right, she’d make sure everyone knew it. Ashton had learned quickly that it was best to deal with her second, to avoid an endless stream of complaints.
As he gently rocked Minnie in his arms, I propped myself up in bed, taking in the sight of him.
“Morning,” he greeted, looking as though he had been awake for hours, his hair tousled and his eyes slightly weary.
“Morning,” I replied, my voice still thick with sleep.
His focus returned to Minnie, and once again, I was left in the shadows, an observer in my own home. After a night of practice, he was already handling the baby like a seasoned pro.
“You’re such a good dad,” I remarked after a moment, my heart swelling with pride.
He turned to me, a playful smirk dancing on his lips. “What about you? Planning to be a good mum?”
I rolled my eyes, yet a smile broke free. “Of course I am!”
As I studied him, I couldn’t help but notice the faint bluish shadows under his eyes. It was clear that sleep had eluded him.
“Did you stay up all night?” I asked, concern lacing my words.
Ashton shot me a quick glance, a hint of annoyance flaring in his eyes, but he remained silent.
Later, the night nurse filled me in on the truth: Ashton had managed to catch some sleep, but only in fleeting moments. The babies demanded nourishment every two hours, and each time he finally settled down, one of them would wake up, often Minnie, whose cries would pierce the stillness of the night, forcing him to leap up before she even had a chance to fully wake.
“So you really didn’t sleep?” I pressed once more.
“What do you think?” he replied, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. “Do you imagine I just sit here staring into space while you’re asleep?”
I paused, suddenly aware of how foolish my question had been.
Still, I felt compelled to point out, “You’ve got dark circles under your eyes. You must be exhausted.”
“Mmm,” he nodded, but quickly shifted the topic. “I’ve got to go out later. Will you be alright with the babies at home?”
“Of course!” I exclaimed, trying to sound more confident than I felt. “The nanny’s here, isn’t she? I’m not alone. Go do what you need to do.”
Even so, as I glanced at the little girl cradled in his arms, an unsettling feeling washed over me.
Ashton appeared equally reluctant, his concern for Minnie evident; she was a little firecracker, full of opinions and demands, unlike calm and easygoing Mickey, who was content with anyone.
As Minnie finished her milk, she smacked her lips and opened her eyes wide, revealing a pair of beautiful, round orbs that seemed to have inherited the best features from both of us. Her pupils were large and clear, sparkling with innocent curiosity.
Ashton gazed at her as if he would grant her the entire world if she only asked.
“All full now?” he asked softly, his voice dripping with affection.
Minnie responded with a toothless grin, but then, without warning, a loud and unmistakable sound erupted from her.
“Oh God,” I exclaimed, instinctively covering my nose with my hand. “She’s done a poo.”
Mickey, from his cot nearby, glanced over with the same wide-eyed expression as his sister, then promptly returned to playing with his tiny hands, unfazed.
Ashton’s expression remained unchanged; he didn’t even flinch at the smell wafting through the air.
“I’ll take her to get cleaned up,” he said, lifting Minnie with ease, as if this were the most ordinary thing in the world.
The moment he stepped out of the room, I heard Minnie’s wailing echo down the hallway. The sound lasted only a few moments before quieting down again.
From the corridor, I could hear the nanny’s hesitant voice. “Sir, Minnie won’t let me hold her.”
“That’s fine,” Ashton replied calmly. “Just tell me what to do; I’ll handle it.”
Their voices faded as they moved further away, and I couldn’t help but feel a warmth spread through my chest at his words, though a pang of guilt quickly followed.
We were both first-time parents, yet how was it that Ashton seemed to navigate this new world with such ease while I struggled? I found myself feeling disgusted by the very thought of my daughter’s dirty nappy.
I slipped on my slippers and padded over to Mickey’s cot. Leaning down, I gently took his tiny hand in mine, feeling the warmth of his small fingers against my palm.
“Mickey, tell me,” I whispered softly, squeezing his fingers gently, “am I a good mum?”
He looked up at me with those round, innocent eyes, filled with confusion, as if to say, “Mum, what are you talking about?”
Conclusion
As the chapter draws to a close, the emotional arc reveals a profound transformation within the narrator. Initially grappling with feelings of jealousy and inadequacy, she gradually comes to recognize the depth of her love for both Ashton and their children. The tender moments shared between Ashton and Minnie, juxtaposed with her own insecurities, highlight the narrator’s internal struggle. Yet, as she witnesses Ashton’s unwavering dedication to their family, her heart swells with pride, igniting a flicker of hope that she too can embrace her role as a mother. This duality of emotions—pride intertwined with self-doubt—creates a poignant reflection on the complexities of parenthood and the journey of self-acceptance.
In the final moments, as she reaches out to Mickey, seeking affirmation of her maternal worth, the narrator’s vulnerability shines through. Her question, though unspoken, resonates with every new parent: “Am I doing this right?” The innocence in Mickey’s gaze serves as a reminder that love and connection transcend the pressures of perfection. Ultimately, the chapter encapsulates the essence of family—an imperfect yet beautiful tapestry woven together by shared experiences, love, and the unyielding desire to nurture. As the narrator embraces her role, she begins to understand that being a good parent is not about flawless execution but rather the unwavering commitment to love and grow alongside her children.
What to Expect in Next Chapter?
What to Expect in Next Chapter?
As the sun rises on a new day, the delicate balance of parenthood continues to unfold, bringing with it a whirlwind of emotions and challenges. In the next chapter, we can expect to dive deeper into the complexities of our protagonist’s feelings as she grapples with her insecurities about motherhood. With Ashton seemingly thriving in his role, her jealousy may intensify, leading to moments of tension and introspection. Will she find the confidence to embrace her new identity, or will the weight of comparison become too much to bear?
Moreover, Ashton’s impending departure raises questions about the dynamics of their partnership. As he steps out into the world, how will she cope with the responsibilities of caring for the twins alone? The introduction of the nanny adds another layer of complexity—will she feel supported, or will it only exacerbate her feelings of inadequacy? Expect moments of vulnerability and revelation as she navigates the uncharted waters of parenthood, striving to find her footing while also yearning for the closeness she once shared with Ashton. The anticipation builds as we await the unfolding of their journey, where love, frustration, and the undeniable bond of family will collide in unexpected ways.
Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
