Chapter 411
Madison
I filled the kettle, set it on the stove, and watched the blue flame flicker beneath it. Tea. Because that’s what responsible adults did when they couldn’t sleep, right? Made tea and pretended it helped.
The kettle whistled. I poured hot water over a chamomile tea bag, watching it steep as the water turned pale gold. Steam curled upward, disappearing into the dark kitchen.
I carried the mug to the table and sat, wrapping my hands around the warmth.
Five days. That’s what I’d given Alexander. Five days to end his engagement to Katherine publicly. Five days to prove he actually meant what he said.
And then what?
That was the question keeping me awake, wasn’t it? Not whether Alexander would follow through. He would. When Alexander Knight made a promise, he delivered. That much I remembered from our working relationship.
No, what kept me staring at the ceiling was what came after.
What happened when he returned to Connecticut, free and available? When there was no Katherine standing between us, no convenient excuse to keep him at arm’s length?
We’d have to figure out co–parenting. Awkward conversations about pickup times, holidays, and whose house Ethan would spend Christmas at. Negotiations about school decisions, medical choices, and all those mundane parenting details I’d been handling alone.
My stomach twisted.
But underneath that practical concern lurked something more dangerous. Something I didn’t want to examine too closely in the harsh light of 2 AM reality.
The possibility of something more between us.
I took a sip of tea, burning my tongue slightly. Served me right for letting my thoughts wander into territory marked “emotional disaster zone.”
Alexander had said he missed me. Said he’d been missing me for five years, too proud and stubborn to admit it. Said his engagement to Katherine was business, convenience, two ambitious people understanding each other’s goals, but nothing
more.
And I’d sat there, my heart hammering against my ribs, wanting desperately to believe him.
That was the problem, wasn’t it? Some traitorous part of me still wanted to believe that Alexander Knight, billionaire CEO, actually cared about me as more than an arrangement or obligation.
My fingers found my lips without conscious thought, touching them lightly.
I remembered how it felt when he kissed me. That intensity, that focus, like nothing else in the world mattered except the two of us and whatever was happening between us. He’d always kissed like he was claiming something, marking territory, making sure I knew exactly who I belonged to.
I dropped my hand, annoyed at myself.
“Stop it,” I muttered into my tea. “Just stop.”
But my mind kept circling back, playing out scenarios like some kind of masochistic fortune teller.
Scenario one: Alexander returned, engagement ended, ready to be a father. We maintained strict boundaries. Separate lives
Chapter 411
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connected only by Ethan. Polite conversations at school events. Careful distance. Safe.
Scenario two: Alexander returned and pursued me the way he pursued business deals. Relentless, strategic, unwilling to accept no for an answer. And I’d have to decide whether to give him another chance or protect myself from potential heartbreak.
Scenario three: We fell back into old patterns. The chemistry, the intensity, the way our bodies fit together like they were designed for each other. But this time with Ethan involved, with stakes higher than just my own broken heart.
I took another sip, the tea cooling now, less scalding.
The truth was, part of me hoped he’d actually follow through. Hoped he’d end things with Katherine and come back serious about building something real instead of something convenient. 1
And that hope scared me more than anything else.
Because hoping meant vulnerability. Meant opening myself up to the possibility of being hurt again. Meant trusting Alexander Knight when every rational instinct screamed that trusting him was dangerous.
“I miss you. I’ve missed you for five years.”
His words echoed in my head, spoken across that bistro table with an intensity that made my chest tight.
Did he mean it? Or was this just guilt talking? Obligation masquerading as genuine feeling?
I set down my mug, running my hands through my hair.
The problem was I knew him too well. Knew how he operated, how his mind worked, how he approached problems like chess matches requiring strategy and calculation.
Was I just another problem to solve? Another acquisition to pursue? Or did he actually feel something real beneath all that controlled CEO exterior?
My phone sat dark on the counter. No messages. No late night texts from Alexander promising he’d handle everything. Just silence.
Good. That’s what I’d asked for. Space to think clearly without his presence clouding my judgment.
Except space didn’t stop my mind from wandering into dangerous territory. Didn’t stop me from remembering how it felt to work beside him, anticipating his needs before he voiced them, understanding the subtle shifts in his mood that others missed.
Didn’t stop me from remembering the nights in his penthouse, his hands on my body, that dark intensity in his eyes when he looked at me like I was something precious he’d finally claimed.
Heat rushed to my face.
“Stop,” I said again, louder this time.
The house stayed silent, offering no judgment, no answers, just the steady tick of the kitchen clock marking time.
I needed to focus on facts, not feelings. Alexander had five days to end his engagement. Until I saw proot, tangible evidence published in newspapers and magazines, I couldn’t trust him.
Wouldn’t trust him.
But what if he actually did it? What if he followed through, ended things with Katherine publicly, came back to Connecticut, ready to be involved in Ethan’s life and potentially mine?
My heart did that stupid flutter thing I hated.
No. I couldn’t let myself go there. Couldn’t let myself hope for something that might just be guilt–driven promises and convenient timing.
Chapter 411
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I finished my tea, the last sip lukewarm and slightly bitter. Appropriate, really.
The mug went into the sink. I rinsed it carefully, watching water swirl down the drain, wishing I could rinse away my complicated feelings as easily.
The kitchen was still dark, still quiet. I should go back to bed. Try to sleep. Face tomorrow with some semblance of rest and rationality.
But my mind kept spinning, kept playing out possibilities I couldn’t quite suppress.
I headed back to my bedroom. Stopped at Ethan’s door, pushing it open slightly.
He was still sprawled across his bed, one arm flung over his dinosaur, completely oblivious to his mother’s midnight crisis. His chest rose and fell steadily, peaceful and perfect.
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Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
