Chapter 175
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Chapter 175
“That was the abnormality in your system,” Aimee says when we get back to the base. She sits beside me and takes my hand. The wolves are looking at me as if I’ve grown a second head on my shoulders.
I feel tired all of a sudden. I’m sitting here wanting nothing more than to sleep for the next two years. I can’t stop replaying everything that happened to me in that hospital. I remember her face as clear as the setting sun in front of me. All he did was say her name, and I completely lost my composure.
Ragnar and the Alpha King are arguing behind me. He doesn’t want to let go of what I did to him, and now that they know what I can do, they’re terrified. I told him not to give me this power, and he didn’t listen. I convinced myself that what I had done was not only necessary, but a hallucination of my time in that shit hole.
“Can you give us a moment?” Ragnar asks Aimee. She gives my hand a reassuring squeeze and stands to leave. “How are you feeling, Soph?”
“I’m tired,” I answer.
When I look up at him, he’s looking at me like he doesn’t know what to say. I can’t hold his gaze because what I did was not something I would normally do. Dr Galloway was glitch or something that just went horribly wrong inside of me for a moment.
Not once did I ever think about hurting her while I was in the hospital. The plan didn’t come from me. That woman gave me an option, and I took it without hesitation or remorse. It messed me up so badly that I repressed the memories and forgot they existed until the moment he spoke her name. It was like the part of my brain that held onto the experience detonated, and there was only one way to go.
“I’m sorry,” I say, not knowing what else to do. “I want to say it’s the first time it happened, but it’s. I stabbed his mother with a silver fork the day I was released from the hospital. Just hearing her name-”
“Hey,” he reaches for me and wipes my tears, “We need to talk about that. You need to tell me exactly what happened.”
“I don’t want to,” I try to look away.
“Sophia,” he says gently. That’s all he says, and I don’t want to keep looking at the pity in his eyes, so I lean in to rest my head on his shoulder.
“Please,” I whisper into his neck. He lets out a heavy sigh and nods.
“Have you eaten?”
“I’m not hungry. I just want-” I pause when I feel something enter our surrounding area. “Is that Aurora’s
dad?”
“We have a breach,” Ragnar stands up without hesitation. Everyone scatters, leaving Aimee and me alone in here. I get up and go for the weapons I took off when we arrived.
“No,” Aimee shakes her head when I offer it to her: We both stay quiet. I listen for gunshots or signs of fighting, but I get nothing. “Why did you choose the medical field if that happened to you?” she asks after a while. “I would hate doctors.”
Chapter 175
“It cured me,” I shrug. “My organs were destroyed, and I have little scars now,” I pull up my shirt to show her. “But she pieced me back together despite the limited resources there are for my blood type There aren’t many hybrids like me, so the procedures took longer.”
“Then why did you react the way you did?” she whispers.
“Have you ever been terrified of something that it alters everything you are? It’s like the fear possesses you Everything you believe in suddenly disappears, and all that matters is getting safe again. It wasn’t my idea, but I ran with it, and it looks like that fear isn’t done yet.”
The others return with the vampire king and a whole lot of camping gear. I overhear them say that they’ve been staying away from places they like to go to, and since Aurora came here, they thought it would be better if they all stuck together. I don’t know if it’s a good idea to have all the kings, their mates, and their guards all in one place with everything going on.
While they’re all setting up, I walk away towards the peak. I need to be alone for a bit without anyone trying to probe me for information. I don’t want to think about it anymore, but here it is taking up space in my head when it shouldn’t.
I sit on the edge of the peak, and I allow myself to break. I can feel the phantom aches in my abdomen. I can feel the fear and anxiety in my muscles as if I were once again strapped to that table without being able to move or scream.
This had been my secret to bear, and once again, I feel like my position in life wants me to keep nothing to myself. If this gets out, it’ll be the same situation I was in at court. This is definitely something I can’t talk about. I killed those people. It wasn’t just the doctor, but the nurses who had been there. One by one. My grandmother provided the information I had asked for, and I did what I had to.
“You’ve always been the suffer in silence type,” I look back to see my grandmother standing not too far with a bag in her hand and a thermos in the other. “I brought your favorite and some tea.”
“Thank you,” I say, turning back to the waves.
“So,” she says, sitting down beside me. “That’s why they all died.”
I look over at her as she pours tea into the thermos lid. She offers it to me, and I take it, needing something, anything to warm the knot in my chest.
“I wasn’t sure if it was real,” I admit.
“I imagine,” she sighs. “You were under a whole lot of drugs and I know exactly what pain does to someone. It feels like all I ever do is apologize.”
“So, don’t,” I hand her the empty lid back.
“Stand,” she says, covering the thermos.
“Do I have to?” I look up at her, annoyed. She smiles and nods. I sigh and stand up.
“That weight isn’t heavier than the ocean,” she says. She holds her hand out, and the ground shakes. I stumble into her with a huge branch, reach out from over the cliff, and stop in front of us. She steps onto it and offers me her hand. “Come on. Show me what you got. I hear you affinity is magnificent. I’d like to see it for myself.”
Chapter 175
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I take her hand, let her pull me in. She places her hand on my waist and moves the giant branch so it’s completely stretched out. We’re right over the water. She lets me go and move towards the edge. I reach out and let the water dance around us. She smiles when I splash right over her head.
“No,” she shakes her head. “I don’t want that elegant, cute shit you put on for everyone else. I want to see the real rage inside of you. Let that knot in your belly do its thing before it consumes you. Show me what you got.” All I can do is stand here and cry as she waits for me to let it all out. “That’s it, my love. Let it all
out.”
I feel it all crashing down on me. I release the hold I have on my affinity, and I let the anger and fear take control. I stop fighting to keep my composure, and I feel the moment it lashes out. The knot in my belly tightens up to the point it hurts deep down into my soul, and I scream, letting it out.
The water below rises and falls back, creating a massive waye. It happens over and over again until there’s a wall of water in front of me. I take a deep breath, holding it in, letting the sound of somersaults vibrate through me. I scream with everything inside of me and push it back as hard as I can. I fall to my knees, gasping for air and crying. Her arms come around me.
“I hate them,” I choke out shakily.
She quietly rubs my back and hums what sounds like Enough, Enough now, by Bad Omens over and over until the sun comes up. Neither of us gets sleep, but she was right. Letting go of my affinity the way I did made me feel much better. I had bottled it up from its awakening, along with all my pent-up emotions. That’s not healthy.
“You said you had breakfast bagels?” I ask because they’re my favorite.
“Yeah,” she smiles and pulls the branch back towards the cliff. She picks up the bag and pulls out two sandwiches wrapped in aluminium foil. I open one and take a bite. “Eliza made them. We have good news. Let’s head back.”
