Chapter 176
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Chapter 176
My muscles ache, and sweat is dripping down my body as I make my way back to the compound. Ragnar is standing outside waiting for me. I’m not sure what we’re waiting for, but this is getting frustrating. We’re giving them the opportunity to run, and everything in my instincts hates it. Especially knowing that they’re the family of that woman.
“Hi,” he greets me. “You should clean up. We’re heading out to the council.”
“Sure,” I say, unable to meet his gaze. He grabs my arm before I can get past him.
“You’ve been avoiding me,” he says. “We’ve been here four days, and I haven’t had a single moment with you alone.”
“Perks of being on base,” I say and pull my arm out of his hold. “I just need some time to clear my head.”
His eyes flutter, and I know it hurt him to hear me say that, but I really don’t want to be alone with him or anyone else. I know that they’re going to try to get information out of me. I don’t have any. I spent the last eight years telling myself that it was all a lie. That I had made it up in the grief of losing my entire family. They wouldn’t understand what that feels like.
I was a kid. Twelve and I had no one by my side. I had no family to defend me or even visit. My time in the hospital was confusing as hell. The weeks that followed, just before entering the academy, are blurry. The mesh with my nightmares and daydreams of going back to that hospital to end everyone who hurt me.
I shower and change into one of the outfits Ana brought for me to replace everything I lost in the fire. Not wanting to have my hair in my face all day, I braid it back and head down to meet up with everyone else.
Everyone is gone. It’s just Ragnar, his father, and my grandmother waiting. The sound of my heels is all I can hear as we all make our way to the car. I pause when I see my grandmother and the King get into the SUV in front of us, meaning Ragnar, and I are going to be alone where he’s going to probe me for information.
I get into the car and buckle in, hoping that he gets the hint. I need to process this properly. It feels like I’m prioritizing it, and that’s not who I am. I want to push it back down where it belongs.
“Ready?” he asks, getting into the passenger seat.
“Yeah,” I nod. He looks me over and smiles.
“You look amazing,” he compliments. I look down at the outfit and agree.
“Ana got me these. It’s a lot cuter than what my grandma gets,” I admit. He smiles as if her agrees. It’s a
three-hour drive to the council from this base.
“You’ve been working out a lot with Xavier,” he says after a while.
“Yeah, it’s helping me,” I nod, not sure what to do.
“Soph,” he sighs, gripping the steering wheel. I try not to react, but I can’t help but look away. “I don’t know what I did to upset you.”
“I’m not upset with you,” I say, looking over at him.
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Chapter 176
“Then why are you avoiding me? You see me, and you turn the other way.”
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“I can feel you, Ragnar. I know how you feel all the time. I know that you want to know what happened, but I meant it. I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Okay,” he sighs. “I just want you to know that I’m right here for anything you need to talk about. You don’t have to avoid me. I can feel you too. I know how scared and confused you are, right now, and I hate it.”
Tears fill my eyes, and the anger in me flares to a suffocating amount. I lower the window to let the ocean breeze in. I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself because he didn’t say anything wrong. I’m just being selfish, and since it’s something I tried to suppress, I don’t know how to handle it.
“I remember it like a fever dream. The time between leaving the hospital and going into the academy. I don’t know what I did or how even-” I rub my face, feeling my anxiety prickle like needles over my skin. I’m shaking again, trying to piece it all together. “I convinced myself none of it was real.
“This isn’t like the Santiago thing, where someone needed to speak up for Omegas. I don’t know what-just hearing her name brought that back. Something that I suppressed because no one needs to know about it.
No one.”
“Okay,” he says gently. He lets out a reluctant sigh. “The council knows about the shadows. Everyone
knows.”
“How? Where is Xavier?”
“The shadow pretending to be him is having trouble holding his form and exposed himself during a press conference where he was telling everyone he knew nothing about the usurper. Those closest to him have been arrested, including Xavier’s mate.
“The council meeting is for him. To reestablish his position and break his bond to his mate. He gave me this for you.”
He reaches into the glove compartment in front of me and opens it, revealing a small box and an envelope. I take a deep breath and reach for it. I open the envelope to find a thank-you card with his name signed at the bottom, along with a little drawing of the sunset. I open the box to find a tennis bracelet inside with baby blue gems and diamonds. There’s a Cinnamonroll charm hanging off it. I might have mentioned that he’s my favorite character before everything went down with the shifter pretending to be the Alpha King.
“Cute,” I say and put it back so I don’t lose it.
“You two got close,” Ragnar says.
“I think we trauma-bonded over broken mate promises. He told me that he has no one outside his mate. He was in a really bad place. I was just doing what you asked.”
“I’m not upset. I think it’s great that he had someone to talk to. He did seem a little more lively when we all
came here.”
“How did Alex fare?” I ask.
“He was pissed the entire time. There is a lot we all need to catch up on. I never in my life would have ever thought of this, but Alex and his mate have codes they speak in to make sure they’re themselves. He told
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me that his mate knew it wasn’t him and that she was instructed to wait until he could reach out to her.
“It’s how we ended up in the ruins. It’s the place they chose to meet up if an issue ever arose. I think it’s a good idea. Especially now that we know that shadows can successfully infiltrate our homes they way they did.”
“Sure,” I agree. “Like what?”
“Do you remember when we were kids and we all had a special handshake to get into Oliver’s gaming room clubhouse?” he asks. I laugh and nod.
“That’s perfect,” I smile at him.
“I wanted to ask sooner, but I haven’t had the chance. Do you want to move back to the castle?” he asks.
“What do you mean? Isn’t everyone going back after this? I assumed.”
“No, not temporary. I mean to live there. I’m asking because I was thinking maybe we can get our own place. Look for a house or something,” he clarifies.
“Do you want that?” I ask turning my body enough so he knows I’m paying attention. I just don’t want to talk about what happened to me as a kid.
“I want you to feel safe, Sophie. I don’t-”
“I feel safe with you,” I reach out placing my hand over his. “Anywhere you are. This thing with the Galloways its a lot like what happened to you after Clarity. It’s something I don’t want to remember or talk about because it eats at me and I feel an equal amount of guilt. I didn’t want you to know and it has nothing to do with what we have. It’s just something I have to live with and it might not seem like it right now, but I’m okay with it. It’s my burden to bear. I know that wherever I rest my head, so as long as you’re there. I’m safe.”
